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    Best. dad. ever. First spotted on The Mary Sue .

    This kid had the most exciting first birthday ever. He won MarioKart:

    This kid had the most exciting first birthday ever. He won MarioKart:

    Ben Stirling / Via attempteda.tumblr.com

    He leveled up in Skyrim:

    He leveled up in Skyrim:

    Ben Stirling / Via attempteda.tumblr.com

    He found the Portal:

    He found the Portal:

    Ben Stirling / Via attempteda.tumblr.com

    He conquered all the Little Big Planets:

    He conquered all the Little Big Planets:

    Ben Stirling / Via attempteda.tumblr.com


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  • 01/06/14--14:27: A Polar BEAR Vortex
  • Fixed that for you.

    This is the REAL Polar Vortex, y'all:

    This is the REAL Polar Vortex, y'all:

    Mathieu Belanger / Reuters

    Mathieu Belanger / Reuters / Via Summer Anne Burton

    Mathieu Belanger / Reuters / Via Summer Anne Burton

    Mathieu Belanger / Reuters / Via Summer Anne Burton


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    Craig Biggio and his fans will have to wait another year.

    Ronald Martinez / Getty Images

    It's been a tough few years for Houston Astros fans. After finally making it to the World Series in 2005 (and losing in four games), they've been on a sharp decline. The best players retired or were traded away, disbanding the fan favorite "Killer Bs" — Craig Biggio, Jeff Bagwell, Derek Bell, and Sean Berry (and later, lovable Lance Berkman). The team spent several years pretending it could compete, overpaying for washed-up pitchers while letting their farm system waste away. Then the Astros' owner agreed to move them to the American League beginning in the 2013 season, taking them out of their division and causing thousands of Houston fans to feel confused about the All-Star Game. Our new owner is putting work into building up the farm system, but in the meantime we must endure one of the worst and cheapest baseball teams in recent memory, losing more than 100 games for the last three consecutive seasons and finishing up the 2013 season with H-town's worst season ever, topped with an end-of-season 15-game losing streak.

    It couldn't get worse, right?

    Ronald Martinez / Getty Images

    The Houston Astros have never won the World Series, and a player has never been inducted into the Hall of Fame as an Astro. Three years ago Jeff Bagwell became eligible and received only 41.7 percent of the vote, despite having once been named by the legendary baseball statistician Bill James as the fourth greatest first baseman of all time. Some writers who shared their ballots explained that Bagwell just seemed like someone who'd used PEDs, even though he was never indicted or failed a drug test. He was bulky in the '90s, a crime unto itself in the eyes of the dusty old men who fill out so many of the Baseball Writers Association of America ballots for the Hall. (An institution already filled with men who played in a segregated league that excluded many of the era's greatest players, a group that includes documented racists, cheaters, drunks, liars, and many users of various drugs.)

    Still, what about Craig Biggio, who played alongside Bagwell during the Astros' own golden era of the late '90s and early '00s? Never a well-built slugger, he was more of an on-base man (he reached base after being hit by a pitch 287 times in his career, the second most of all time). He was beloved by the fans in Houston, a leader on the team, and dominant in his era. He is part of the elite 3,000-hit club, a group of 28 players who've almost all been inducted into the Hall of Fame when they became eligible, mostly on their first ballot (the only exceptions are Biggio, Pete Rose — ineligible due to his ban from baseball for gambling — and known PED user Rafael Palmiero).

    Biggio was first eligible for the HOF last year, and he didn't make it. Speculation has it that a large chunk of writers chose not to vote for anyone on the ballot that year to protest the new inclusion of known PED users such as Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens. Biggio was not one of those — no one has ever seriously accused the man of using steroids, outside of claiming that "everyone" in the era was part of the problem — but he didn't make it either. No one did, a punishment not to the players who were swept up in the PED era, but for the fans who'd waited so long for one of their own to be immortalized in the Hall.

    But this year would be the year, everyone said. I made tentative plans to visit Cooperstown for the induction ceremony, my second visit. The first time I went to see the Hall of Fame, I was so inspired that I started a personal art project, drawing every Hall of Famer ever inducted in chronological order by induction year. I've been waiting ever since I began that project to know that I would get to sketch a "H" for Houston on the cap of one of the beloved Bees. I couldn't wait, and last night I had tears in my eyes just picturing the moment I'd read about it and call my Houston-born boyfriend, post Biggio pictures on Facebook, and celebrate with my family and friends who've been waiting for a reminder of why we love baseball so much, and why sticking with the Astros through all these years was finally worth it for this moment.

    And then:


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    Stoneybrook’s finest, ranked from worst to best. Claudia Kishi forever.

    First, some ground rules:

    - These outfits are ranked definitively from worst to best.

    -All 131 original Baby-Sitters Club series books are included. F$%d the Little Sisters series.

    -When more than one person appears, the cover is ranked based on the most noticeable/important outfit, as determined with a special secret science.

    - Since Claudia Kishi is obviously a style icon, the bar is set higher for her and she has to work harder to compete with the other girls (at least when they actually put effort into their looks) to prevent her from just completely dominating the top 25. This is also known as the Dancing With the Stars rule.

    Dawn's denim-on-denim on Dawn and the School Spirit War

    Dawn's denim-on-denim on Dawn and the School Spirit War

    DAWN, NO. No, Dawn. You might have an idea that someone like Kristy or maybe Mallory was the "worst dressed" baby-sitter overall, but you're wrong. Dawn — hippie, California girl, vegetarian Dawn — was the WORST. I don't know why Dawn seems to think that being socially conscious has to equal wearing unflattering, personality-free clothes every day of middle school, but she does. This denim tuxedo is just the beginning.

    Scholastic

    Mary Anne's athletic gear on Mary Anne and Miss Priss

    Mary Anne's athletic gear on Mary Anne and Miss Priss

    OK, might as well get this out of the way: oversized sweaters/sweatshirts/tops are a MAJOR factor in many of the baby-sitters outfits. It's almost like Kristy ordered everyone to wear clothes three sizes too big (totally something Kristy would do, to be honest) for the entirety of their stints with the club. It's ridiculous! Mary Anne takes it way too far here in the interest of contrasting with Jenny Prezzioso's prissiness, which is actually kinda adorable. Mary Anne's sweatshirt thing is clearly an adult sized XXL, and her greige sweatpants seem to be tucked into her athletic socks. Totally unacceptable.

    Scholastic


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    Dinanda Nooney’s At Home in Brooklyn photograph series was the result of over a year of almost daily work, crisscrossing the borough to photograph normal people inside their homes — long before decorating blogs and Pinterest made it hip to snoop.

    Dinanda Nooney's project looked inside Brooklyn before it was the cool (and expensive) borough for the hipster elite, crisscrossing neighborhoods to look inside real people's homes. Nooney died in 2004, but her daughter Jill told BuzzFeed that "she would love the fact the images are getting some play." You can look at 576 of her photographs online at the New York Public Library site.

    Julie Merz, Boerum Hill, 1978.

    Julie Merz, Boerum Hill, 1978.

    Dinanda Nooney / Via New York Public Library

    The Burkes, Bedford-Stuyvesant, 1978.

    The Burkes, Bedford-Stuyvesant, 1978.

    Dinanda Nooney / Via New York Public Library

    The Redds, Clinton Hill, 1978.

    The Redds, Clinton Hill, 1978.

    Dinanda Nooney / Via New York Public Library


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    Tonight, ESPN premieres 30 for 30: The Price Of Gold , a look back at the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan scandal that rocked women’s skating in the ’90s. Obviously they’ve been reading your diary, because you’ve been dreaming about these ladies for years.

    Because of everything happening in this photo:

    Because of everything happening in this photo:

    Getty Images / Tim DeFrisco

    And this one:

    And this one:

    Getty Images / Mike Powell

    Big smiles.

    Big smiles.

    Getty Images / Chris Cole

    Surya Bonaly's back-flips.

    Surya Bonaly's back-flips.

    Jamie Squire / Allsport / Getty Images


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    Our world is a better place now that a skateboarding Australian cat named Didga is in it.

    This is Didga, an Australian cat who recorded his best day ever for all of us to enjoy vicariously.

    This is Didga, an Australian cat who recorded his best day ever for all of us to enjoy vicariously.

    Via youtube.com

    I recommend Ice Cube's "It Was A Good Day" as your soundtrack to this experience (NSFW language).

    You can mute the music on the full video, which doesn't do this cat's perfect day justice.

    embed.spotify.com

    First he checked out the beautiful beach.

    First he checked out the beautiful beach.

    Via youtube.com

    He got to laugh at this girl who is bad at skateboarding compared to him.

    He got to laugh at this girl who is bad at skateboarding compared to him.

    Via youtube.com


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    Marry me, Matt Flamhaff. Marry me all night long.

    Even as a child, he was perfect.

    Even as a child, he was perfect.

    Sony Pictures Entertainment

    He invented the selfie!

    He invented the selfie!

    Sony Pictures Entertainment

    AND THEN HE GREW UP AND TURNED INTO THIS.

    AND THEN HE GREW UP AND TURNED INTO THIS.

    Sony Pictures Entertainment / Via fanpop.com

    This perfect man with excellent taste in T-shirts.

    This perfect man with excellent taste in T-shirts.

    Sony Pictures Entertainment


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    It’s complicated. REALLY complicated.

    1. Single and READY TO MINGLE!

    2. Single and ready for a Friday Night Lights marathon and at least three bags of microwave popcorn.

    3. Single, and have been for some time... starting to wonder if it's me?

    4. Single — BOOM, TAKE THAT. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS.

    5. Single and currently right swiping on Tindr.

    6. Single and currently left swiping on Tindr.

    7. Single, for the first time in years and really happy about it so please don't fuck it up by having perfect cheekbones or smelling really good.

    8. Please display [Single] for the person I have an all-consuming crush on and hide for everyone else.

    9. Single but thinking daily about someone I dated seven years ago — is this you, Chris?

    10. In a cool relationship.

    11. In an adequate relationship.

    12. In a shitty relationship.

    13. In a relationship that works most of the time but I'm not 100% positive that it's going to stay that way just because I get really grossed out when they eat and we don't have sex anymore.

    14. In a relationship, if by "relationship" you mean watching tattoo reality shows all night and sleeping in the same bed but with two different sets of covers.

    15. In a relationship but please don't let that stop you from flirting with me — I really like it when you flirt with me.

    16. In a relationship with someone whose relationship status is hidden on Facebook and I want to ask them to change it but I feel like it's such stupid thing I shouldn't care about.

    17. In a relationship with someone who isn't on Facebook and hates having their photo online and so I worry that people who don't know me very well think I completely made this significant other up, but I swear I didn't.

    18. In a relationship with my vibrator.

    19. In a relationship with my neighbor's cat.

    20. In a relationship with french fries.

    21. In a relationship with my best friend's Facebook account, LOL.

    22. In a relationship with my best friend's Facebook account but I actually am secretly in love with them.

    23. In a relationship with my best friend, actually (aww).

    24. In a relationship that may have just ended, but maybe it was just a really bad fight and I haven't decided if I should change my relationship status yet.

    25. In a happy relationship but feeling a twinge of jealousy every time people tell funny stories about dating.

    26. In an unfulfilling relationship and just waiting for one of my Facebook friends to read this and help coach me through actually breaking up with someone.

    27. In the best relationship I've ever been in but can't seem to get happy anyway because that's what being me is like.

    28. In a relationship but literally ready to drop it as soon as YOU friend request me — you know who you are.

    29. In a relationship and not cheating or trying to, but feeling like I might if I had the opportunity and I was drunk enough, which makes me feel like a terrible person and like I might as well have already done it.

    30. In a relationship but suspect my significant other is cheating and I spend the majority of my Facebook time digging up clues on this subject

    31. Engaged and have been for over two years... and let's face it it's probably never going to happen.

    32. Engaged but still pretty sure we'll break up before we even get to the serious planning stages of our wedding.

    33. Engaged but secretly completely panicked and trying desperately to figure out how to deal and whether to break it off before or after our already-paid for wedding.

    34. Engaged with this fascinating article I was just reading.

    36. Just engaged, literally never checking Facebook because I spend all my time on Pinterest looking at DIY projects I will never have the time or energy to pull off for my own wedding.

    37. Not actually engaged, but there's 700 pins on my Pinterest wedding board and I'm hoping they get the hint soon?

    38. Married and it's super great.

    39. Married and it's exactly like it was before we were married.

    40. Married and living with a mountain of regret.

    41. Married and pretending I'm single on a dating website, just waiting for that inevitable moment when one of my spouse's friends sees me and my entire life becomes a lie.

    42. Married and still just as in love as I was when we were falling and it makes all of our other friends sick.

    43. Married and loving my spouse so much that suddenly death scares me in a way that it never did before and I'm not sure it's worth it TBH.

    44. Married with children and it's too late to change my mind about all this, huh?

    45. Married with a new baby and trying to figure out if it's cool to have sex with their crib in the room.

    46. Married with two families who don't know about each other.

    47. Married with cats and I'm pretty sure I love them as much as people love their kids.

    48. Married to tequila.

    49. Married to hot dogs.

    50. Married "to my work" [hoping my boss reads this].

    51. Married to the Streets, the 2012 album by Young Scooter.

    52. In a civil union because people in my state are prejudiced.

    53. In a civil union out of solidarity because we're really, really good people.

    54. In a civil union, in a cute ironic way because my boyfriend is afraid of commitment.

    55. In a civil union with my roommate / best friend / dog's facebook account, LOL.

    56. In a civil union with tacos.

    57. In a domestic partnership, because eff the government.

    58. In a domestic partnership if by "domestic" you mean "sharing rent" and by partnership you mean "person who I have sex with periodically and who makes a mess".

    59. In a domestic partnership, which is totally lovely and no we're not planning to get married and please for the love of god stop asking us.

    60. In a domestic partnership, and daydreaming every day about the days when I lived alone.

    61. In a domestic partnership, because saying it here will help make the argument to my employer that my roommate should be able to join my health insurance.

    62. In a domestic partnership with the Real Housewives of Orange County.

    63. In an open relationship, which is going great and I don't want to answer any questions about it even though there was no need for me to mention it here and yet I have.

    64. In an open relationship if you're Zooey Deschanel or Benedict Cumberbatch, those are our "exceptions".

    65. In an open relationship because my partner read a book about it — it's great, really.

    66. In an open relationship and having sex with different people whenever I'm bored while still in a deeply nurturing relationship with my partner — I know you're kind of jealous but will act incredulous and clutch your pearls instead.

    67. In an open relationship with pizza — you're welcome to share.

    68. Separated from reality.

    69. Separated from Ryan Gosling, which is really too bad.

    70. Divorced, but actually we were never married, I'm just feeling really dramatic.

    71. Divorced, thank God.

    72. Divorced, and I have no idea why I haven't just changed my status to single but it feels like another letting go and I'm not ready.

    73. Divorced from reality.

    74. Actually widowed, no jokes alert.

    75. Widowed, but only figuratively to depict the depth of my last heartbreak.

    76. I have a regular booty call, but I'm waiting for something better.

    77. In a vicarious relationship through Sherlock fan-fiction.

    78. Thinking about you — you know who you are.

    79. Ban men

    80. Thirsty

    81. It's so complicated that I'm not even sure I understand it myself anymore.

    82. It's not that complicated, but "single" seemed boring.

    83. It's complicated — that's Facebook's code word for "fucked up," right?

    84. He's just not that into me.

    85. I'm just not that into her.

    86. I've listened to "Nothing Compares 2 U" 32 times today.

    87. The person I have a Twitter crush on fav'd one of my tweets, so I think we're in a relationship now?

    89. Naked right now.

    90. Pornhub Pro Subscriber

    91. Unfit for human contact.

    92. Pretty sure this is all pointless and that ultimately we'll never really know another person.

    93. Every living creature dies alone.

    94. Contemplating the cavernous gulf between me and every other one of my Facebook friends.

    95. Really low score on Lulu and desperately trying to figure out who reviewed me.

    96. Drunk in love.

    97. 01101001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101.

    98. Do not display — meant to convey mysteriousness and how much IDGAF even though I totally do.

    99. Do not display — because the last time my status changed and you all commented on it I wanted to die.

    100. Do not display, do not read anything into the lack of display, please stop assuming things about me because of this, Jesus.

    101. Have risen to a level of enlightenment in which I no longer care about human relationships at all and all I feel is the warmth of all life on earth. Om.


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    Retro weddings are so in right now, so why not take inspiration from the cuties that actually got hitched back when cat eye glasses and big hair were all the rage?

    A hippie wedding in San Francisco.

    A hippie wedding in San Francisco.

    Flickr: adavey

    This ballsy blue dress.

    This ballsy blue dress.

    University of Kansas / Via luna.ku.edu:8180/luna/servlet

    Peter pan collar wedding dress!

    Peter pan collar wedding dress!

    Flickr: mrlewisblog


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  • 02/05/14--09:37: Which Al Roker Are You?
  • We’ve all got a little piece of the internet’s favorite weather forecaster inside our hearts.


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    These two are what “It’s complicated” was invented for.

    instagram.com

    B.J. Novak and Mindy Kaling first met when they were both young writers on The Office. On the show they also played Kelly and Ryan , a turbulent on- and off-again couple whose sexual chemistry was constantly challenged by the fact that they were total opposites who constantly fought.

    Mindy and B.J. have admitted that they based the characters' relationship on their own inseparable but tumultuous friendship in the writers room. B.J. and Mindy also dated in real life during the show — according to Mindy, "[We] dated on and off for a couple of years, and now we are just, like, best friends. Like, real best friends. It's the kind of friendship you have when you are embedded with someone, that you can only get by putting in that insane amount of time with people."

    In other words, they're basically living out the plot of one of those adorable will they or won't they romantic comedies that Mindy loves so much. SIGH.

    Whenever B.J. says super nice things about how talented Mindy is.

    Whenever B.J. says super nice things about how talented Mindy is.

    "A friend of mine who doesn't know Mindy told me that for a year she considered Mindy's book one of her closest friends. People really respond to her voice. It's extremely intelligent without being the least bit pretentious." —B.J. Novak

    Kevin Winter / Getty Images


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    Are you more of a Stabler or a Benson? CHUNG CHUNG!

    Possible results include every detective who lasted more than two seasons on Law & Order, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, or Law & Order: SVU. CHUNG CHUNG.

    NBC


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    If you remove the dudes from pairs skating, the ladies look like superheroes. Which they basically are.

    Russia's Ksenia Stolbova minus Fedor Klimov.

    AP Photo/Ivan Sekretarev

    Canada's Meagan Duhamel minus Eric Radford.

    REUTERS/David Gray

    France's Vanessa James minus Morgan Ciprès.

    REUTERS/Brian Snyder

    Russia's Tatiana Volosozhar minus Maxim Trankov.

    Phil Noble / Reuters


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    If you have preconceived notions about Texans and tolerance, Dale Hansen — a sportscaster for ABC’s Dallas affiliate WFAA — might surprise you with his thoughts on Michael Sam . Someone give this man a raise.

    Here's Hansen's thoughtful speech:

    Hansen's scathing words towards NFL employees who are afraid of drafting an openly gay player: "It wasn't that long ago that we were being told that black players couldn't play in our games because it would be uncomfortable. And even when they finally could it took several more years before a black man played quarterback, because we weren't comfortable with that either. So many of the same people who used to make that argument and the many who still do are the same people who say government should stay out of our lives but then want government in our bedrooms. I've never understood how they feel comfortable laying claim to both sides of that argument."

    He then opens up and admits "I'm not always comfortable when a man tells me he's gay, I don't understand his world. But I do understand that he's part of mine."

    After that, the sportscaster goes on to quote writer and civil rights activist Audre Lorde, who said “It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.”

    youtube.com

    Mike Dinovo / Reuters

    Hansen concludes that "we've always been able to recognize 'em, some of us accept 'em, and I want to believe that there will be a day that we do celebrate 'em. I don't know if that day's here yet, I guess we're about to find out, but when I listen to Michael Sam I do think it's time to celebrate him now."


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    Have you ever felt like you loved your cat more than you could even stand? Whisper feels you.

    whisper.sh / Via itunes.apple.com

    whisper.sh / Via itunes.apple.com

    whisper.sh / Via itunes.apple.com

    whisper.sh / Via itunes.apple.com


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    Indy the golden retriever is 13-years-old and this is the best game of ball I’ve ever seen.

    Indy has figured out how to play without getting up from his comfortable spot.

    Good dog!

    youtube.com / Via arbroath.blogspot.com

    Let's see that again!

    Let's see that again!


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  • 02/17/14--12:07: What Kind Of Bird Are YOU?
  • Are you more of a wise ol’ owl or a rockin’ robin?

    Focus Features / Via pennants-aloft.tumblr.com


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    The world is a beautiful and complicated place.

    This 4.5 minute video explains the fascinating and tenuous balance of life on earth better than most biology courses.

    When wolves were reintroduced to Yellowstone National Park in the United States after being absent nearly 70 years, some remarkable changes began to occur...

    This narration is from George Monbiot's TED Talk, "For More Wonder, Rewild The World." George Monbiot's book "Feral: Searching For Enchantment On The Frontiers Of Rewilding" follows his own efforts to reconnect with nature and argues that by restoring our damaged ecosystems, we can bring magic and wonder into our lives.

    youtube.com


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    Don’t forget to loop me on this one.

    If you work in an office, you've probably received an email that looks kinda like this:

    If you work in an office, you've probably received an email that looks kinda like this:

    (this is an extreme and made up example, obviously, but not THAT far from reality!)

    And it probably made you feel kind of like...

    And it probably made you feel kind of like...

    gifdistrict.tumblr.com

    "Best practices" = Rules.


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